WHAT IS YOUR IMMIGRATION STORY?
My mother and father both grew up in Tehran and immigrated separately as situations in Iran deteriorated leading up to the revolution. They both ended up at UC Davis and met there and I was born in New Jersey and spent a good chunk of my life there, then living abroad in the United Kingdom for some period of time with them as a child as well.
WHAT DOES YOUR CURRENT JOURNEY LOOK LIKE?
So they lived internationally in Paris for about five years and came back to the United States about 2 or 3 years ago. Their desire was to be closer to family but they felt like the social services and also just a general acceptance of who they were as people was far greater in Europe. So one thing that I think punctuated their experience more recently has been a sense of responsibility guilt because I think they came to America seeking opportunity for my sister and I and now looking at everything from housing affordability to the conditions now that many immigrants face they feel like it was their responsibility to protect us from that, which is something that my sister and I both have underscored was never their responsibility and not a thing that they're solely responsible for but I think in more recent years they felt like they checked all the boxes and did everything that they were asked to do and that so far it worked out. But ultimately more than anything they wanted to leave something for their son and daughter, and they feel like increasingly what they hoped they would leave for us isn't here anymore. They're Persian, so they set impossible standards for themselves and have at times for my sister and I, too. So, I think they've done more for us as parents than most people know. But I think that they just wish that they could do everything. I've tried to tell them that that's just not an outcome that they can control,
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What are your hopes for the future?
I don't plan on starting a family myself, but I've found a lot of identity and connection with other people with experiences like mine, both born in other countries and also first-generation immigrants. I've found a lot of power in building community and closeness with people and so my deep hope is that I can build the same feeling of family without actually producing children. and also, in the process of embracing how I am different from other people and meeting other people who don't feel like they necessarily belong somewhere. Finding belonging in that has been a real motivator for me personally.